Someone once came to R’ Naftali of Ropshitz. “My friend regrets something that he did and he sent me to ask you how he can properly repent.” The Ropshitzer eyed the man and said, “If your friend feels uncomfortable asking me directly, he could have come and pretend to be asking on behalf of someone else.”
THINKING ABOUT THE STORY:
After posting this story online, a few people asked why the Rabbi chose to embarrass his student rather than just helping him with his problem.
I would imagine that the nature of the relationship between this Rebbe and the disciple was one where R’ Naftali would be saying this with a wink. He was, by the way, well known as someone with a sense of humour.
There are several lessons he may have been trying to impart to his disciple. One is that when you are seeking to improve, you have to be brutally honest – especially with yourself. There is a story told of two motorcycle riders who got into an accident and were taken to the emergency room. A doctor approached and began probing the leg of one of the men. The man grimaced in pain and screamed at the top of his lungs in agony. The doctor said he’d back in a few minutes to examine the other rider. When he manipulated this man’s leg, he didn’t let out a sound. When the doctor again left, his friend asked him how he was able to bravely submit to the examination so calmly. His friend said, “Are you kidding. After I saw what happened to you, do you think I was going to show him my bad leg?”
A second lesson is that a person shouldn’t be embarrassed to discuss anything with their Rebbe. A Rebbe is supposed to be someone a student is able to confide in and share what is happening in their life openly. Any pretense really violates the integrity of that relationship and the Rebbe’s ability to help will be diminished.
Of course, I don’t think the conversation ended there and would imagine they would have ended up discussing the issue at hand.
